Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Lydia's Baby

For her birthday, Lydia received a gift certificate to Toys 'r' Us from my aunt Judy. On Sunday, after week of visits from Britt and Mike, as well as Uncle Markus, Robin and I headed to Toys 'r' Us to get Lydia whatever her heart desired--as long as it was within the appropriate age range, not too loud, or misogynist.

Lydia has fallen in love with baby dolls, so we had a feeling that this trip would lead us in that direction. Sure enough, Lydia got very excited when we walked into the baby doll aisle and immediately went for two different dolls. One was a baby with a pacifier (Pa-bee!) and the other was a baby with diapers. After much deliberation from the Lyds, she settled on the diaper baby.

Now, this doll (a little boy according to the package and it's blue diaper) didn't only come with diapers. It also came with a bottle. Robin and I, new to the baby doll world, did not read the packaging carefully other than noting that the doll was also anatomically correct. We felt quite progressive as we checked out with our anatomically correct baby doll for our daughter and headed to the car.

In the car, I examined the box. I learned that the bottle actually was meant to feed the baby water and upon "drinking" the water, the baby wet its diaper. Then, sensors placed on the baby's "correct" anatomy told the baby that it needed a diaper change, making the baby cry. (Note: The baby also coos and says "Mama" when you squeeze its hand.)

Sucker that I am, I ignored the voice in my head that said, "Don't let Lydia know the bottle actually functions and the baby drinks water. She will never know!" Instead, we got home, I broke the baby free from its box and filled its bottle with water. We fed the baby some water. Lydia was very excited as the baby made sucking sounds (seriously.) And then the magic happened.

The baby wet its diaper. And by "wet its diaper," I mean water started gushing out of the holes in the baby's correct anatomy and all over my jeans and the floor. In all of their efforts to make a realistic baby, turns out the company forgot realistic diapers. No leak protection there!

Lydia looked confused, I looked horrified, and Robin promptly figured out a way to plug the bottle so no water comes out.

Crisis averted.

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